Mr. Boss VS Michael Scott (Smiling Friends VS The Office)
“I’m the Boss.” - The Completetionist
Mr. Boss, the top dog of Smiling Friends Inc.
Michael Scott, regional manager of Dunder Mifflin paper company.
Work sucks and that’s just a fact of life, but between these two, maybe work can become a little bit more fun… and dangerous. As we look at these two prime examples of the ‘fun’ kind of boss, let’s see which one would really win?
Before We Begin
The media to be used for these two is rather simple. Mr Boss will have all media tied to Smiling Friends including the original series, the puppet versions, and commentary. While Michael will more complicatedly have the original series, deleted scenes, webisodes, games, etc.
However the more interesting point will be the usage of Michael’s own character he made aptly named ‘Michael Scarn’, a secret agent who performs many exceptional feats. We will go into later the actual usage of this but we will note that it is indeed part of the blog for now.
As usually not everything is by us. Credits to Niko for some of the Smiling Friends calcs, The Smiling Friends respect thread, VS Battle Wiki calculations.
Background
Mr. Boss
The highly eccentric friendly Boss (that’s probably his actual name) is the head of Smiling Friends Inc, Father, Enemy to the woke agenda, lover of jesters and demons (suckin the soul straight outta his asshole), but most importantly the boss to his boys!
Michael Scott
Micheal Gary Scott was once a salesman like any other member of the Dunder Mifflin paper company, but once he was promoted to regional manager… let’s just say it got a little more fun. Micheal strives to be the world’s best boss to his employees by constant activities, lessons and games. Day to day there could be lessons about racism, basketball games in the warehouse, or crashing his car into a lake. Over the years all of the members of the office would grow accustomed to this behavior and try to shut it out, especially the likes of Pam and Jim, but luckily Micheal had his Assistant (to the) Regional Manager, Dwight Shrute, to rely on to always support his antics and buffoonery. But as Micheal shared more care and respect to his workers, they did share an earnest desire to be his friend and even family, as he left for season rot to be with his future wife, Holly. And he shared a tearful goodbye with Pam, only coming back later for Dwight’s wedding. While he may have been an obnoxious manager in the past, this boss really proved that he is the #1.
Experience and Skill
These two have nothing. I mean they run businesses and Scott might have fought once but there is so little to talk about. Hawk Tuah!
Abilities
Mr. Boss
Human Physiology
The system of sapian life in Smiling Friends spreads among four distinct categories of which includes critters, humans, sci-fi/fantasy creatures, and miscellaneous (monsters, demons, Mr Frog, etc). But despite this distinction, Mr Boss displays very different attributes to that of a regular person in our world. This includes being able to contort and manipulate his body to his will, changing eye color, bending and contorting his body, etc.
Anatomical Manipulation / Shapeshifting
The Boss has the ability as alluded beforehand to change his body at will in a variety of ways, notably when he wishes to scare his boys and turn his face into a dog, reflecting its features later in the episode when he barks at Allan.
He can also bend his finger backwards at will… it really hurts.
Mr. Boss was also able to turn into a tree while guiding Pim, of which the commentary of the first season has revealed that this is in fact Mr Boss displaying himself on a tree to remind Pim of what he had told him. Unclear if this is shapeshifting or another ability, specifying it here just in case.
Michael Scott
Business Ability
Michael is a very talented businessman and salesman, managing to be a great boss of his branch of Dunder Mifflin for years and even of his own competing paper company. Proving time and time again that despite his general attitude and demeanor that he is a very successful leader and salesperson.
He has ran his own private company, convinced several people who were originally seen as impossible to sell to buy from his sales, ran one of the most successful regions of Dundee Mifflin, and made extremely close friends and family across his many years at the company.
Arsenal
Mr. Boss
Miniature Version of Mr. Boss
“That's a little version of me Allan, I want you to have it.”
Jason
“No biting.” Jason is Mr. Boss's beautiful 18 year old son capable of blinding people with dust and melting things such as a microwave.
M-16
A standard assault rifle that Mr Boss used in a crazy state to try and murder the Frowning Friends.
Sniper
A standard sniper rifle that Mr Boss plans to use on Mr Frog after Glep had elected him as president, making Mr Boss lose $10,000.
Revolver
Mr Boss keeps a revolver on hand to kill any rotton snowmans that may or may not have spawned from his radioactive waste.
The Magical Red Jewel
Bought by Mr Boss in Spamtopia, the magical red jewel has the power to resurrect his son Jason after his accidental and sudden death at the hands of Charlie and Allan.
Rocket Boots
The perfect footwear for those times where you want to casually go to the moon. Built by Allan, his boy (more than just a pretty face). They show up for one scene where Mr Boss is cemented as the funniest character in the whole smiling friends verse shouldn’t do stand up tho.
Cyanide Pills
When taken by the people of Spamtopia, Mr Boss showed off that under his nose he keeps pills that would kill himself before facing a violent death at the hands of a creature with a strange eye.
Michael Scott
Best Boss Mug
Definitive proof of him being the world’s best boss.
Dundies
The awards that Micheal hands out to all of his employees for various reasons such as ‘Whitest Sneakers’ or ‘Hottest in the Office’.
George Foreman Grill
While we do not see it in the show, Micheal owns a George Foreman grill to cook bacon that had burnt his foot to a crisp and crippled Micheal to the point that he needed Dwight’s help to get to work.
Toby’s Gift
Suck on this!
(That’s what she said)
Paintball Gun & Protection
Gifted by Dwight on Christmas and on his final day at work, Micheal was in a paintball fight with his assistant (to the) regional manager and showed pretty good skill at such.
Scottcoins
Currency that Michael introduced to the employees that can be used to purchase decorations that boost productivity of a salesperson.
Forms
Mr Boss
Insane Boss
While it is a bit vaguely defined, in ‘Frowning Friends’ Mr Boss has reached a point of absolute insanity where he goes on a rampage to try and kill the Frowning Friends.
Michael Scott
Prison Mike
The worst thing about prison was- wa- was the dementors!
Michael Klump
I say I say I say I sit on you.
Michael Scarn (Debatable)
Michael Scarn is Michael's depiction of himself in his own spy thriller. He is shown to be a remarkable spy capable of firing guns, playing hockey, and saving the world.
Stats
Mr. Boss
Feats
Boss of The Smiling Friends
Loves his boys
Learned important lessons about how all cultures are equal
Defeated the blackface demon
Owns 1/4th of Hell
Attack Potency
(Nothing more powerful than love)
Durability
Endured having his soul sucked straight out of his asshole
Was smashed through a wall (0.0044 Tons of TNT)
Speed
Flew off of earth to go to the moon in seconds (0.32 c) (Debatable, see Before Verdict)
Michael Scott
Feats
#1 Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin
Loves his office family
Ran his own paper company
Created his own commercial better than the actual company’s
Defeated racism within the office
Was Dwight Shrute’s best man
Attack Potency
Durability
Speed
Ran at 12 mph and then proceeded to run at 31 mph (Superhuman) (Debatable, see Before the Verdict)
Ran out of the building after there was an alarm before everyone else in the office
Scaling
Mr. Boss
Charlie Dompler
Charlie Dompler is a favorite of Mr Boss' employees (they all are hehe). But with such a dangerous job of making people smile, he’s had his fair share of feats over the years!
Punches out Jason(he said he’d do it man, he warned him)
Endured the throw to Earth by God… until the crash
Deflected a beam with his shield (1.04c) (Debatable, see Before the Verdict)
Pim Pimling
Pim Pimling is a favorite of Mr Boss' employees (they all are hehe). But with such a dangerous job of making people smile, he’s had his fair share of feats over the years!
Hit a satellite with a bat (0.000028 Tons of TNT)
Turned green???
Allan Red
Allan Red is a favorite of Mr Boss' employees (they all are hehe). But with such a dangerous job of making people smile, he’s had his fair share of feats over the years!
Tanks a rocket launcher blast (0.1 Tons of TNT)
Tanks a grenade (0.0012 Tons of TNT)
Just wanted his cheese
Glep
Glep is a favorite of Mr Boss' employees (they all are hehe). But with such a dangerous job of making people smile, he’s had his fair share of feats over the years!
Mr. Frog
Hello
Michael Scott
Dwight Shrute
Micheal has directly contested against Dwight physically on a few occasions but very notable in their battle in Season 2, ‘The Fight’.
Outran a black pepper snake (8 mph)
Dwight says his speed is between a snake and a mongoose… and a panther (12 mph - 20 mph - 35 mph)
Andy Bernard
By extension of scaling to Dwight, Micheal should also be comparable to the likes of Andy and his Ed Helms related schenagains.
Various Officeworkers
Micheal should of course scale to the rest of The Office… duh.
Jesse Pinkman (Debatable see BTV)
Yes, Creed does canonically get meth from Jesse Pinkman.
Took hits from Hank who has gotten into bar fights and broke mirrors
Scales to Walt who had been inside of an explosion that had blew up a room
Most of Gus Fring’s body had survived a explosion that destroyed a room (clearly)
Michael Scarn
We already described this in forms… we can move on. Link to the whole special.
Dodges bullets
Again with submachine guns
Survived being shot
Hit a hockey puck out of a stadium and at a satellite (202 Tons of TNT/0.011 c)
Weaknesses
Mr. Boss
Mr Boss is required to follow the rules he put in place for The Smiling Friends for that they ‘must do whatever the client asks until they smile :-)’ with no exceptions. Mr Boss can also become incredibly insane when given a rival such as the Frowning Friends, he’s also able to be manipulated such as when Satan’s Daughter had sucked the soul right out of his asshole. You- your asshole?
Michael Scott
Micheal is… very passionate to say the least. He cares a lot about his job and the people he works with to such an extent that he’s almost gotten himself and others fired because of it. Most people find him very annoying and irritating a lot of the time which has caused complications in the relationships with his coworkers and friends. He’s also headstrong and can grow very angry over monotonous or small things that build up over time.
Before We Decide
FTL Smiling Friends?
(Unrelated gif he just fast)
Charlie uses a dragon-scale shield to deflect what is presumably a beam of light (moves in a straight line, retains its color, etc.) that petrifies people. Only major contradiction is that it has force when attacking the Medusa but not when striking the shield or knights and there’s no reason to presume that the scales are inherently reflective either by proxy of reptilian scales or magical properties.
Is this legit? Up to interpretation I suppose. Kinda unclear. Probably not because it has enough force to blow up the Medusa monster. Still pretty funny tho.
On the other end, Mr Boss’ relativistic rocket boots should apply but only to travel speed.
Star Level Mr Boss?
Fanart reposted on Adult Swim so Nah.
Superhuman Speed Michael?
Micheal is in a competition to run faster than Dwight with the help of a meter to see how fast they are going, Micheal then uses it to run at 31 mph while a car passes by. Is this viable! No, not especially. Will we use it? Yeah.
BREAKING BAD SCALING??? (and Others)
Yes, The Office has indeed crossed over with Breaking Bad among various other television shows at an Emmy’s ceremony. Is any of this canon? Probably not because the Parks and Recreation and 30 Rock casts are there which would have many contradictions with actors established in both series (Karen and Ann, The Photographer and Pete, etc.) however this is very funny and doesn’t matter so we should totally use it.
Why Are We Using Michael Scarn?
While obviously we shouldn't use this, lick my balls and that's what she said. Otherwise it is literally a normal ass guy VS Mr. Boss.
Verdicts
This may be a complicated match on paper given how many strange feats and… let’s be frank fictionalized identities and lies. But given the strangeness of both, we're just gonna go all in and give them everything. Meaning that despite Mr Boss’ many advantages, he just cannot get around Micheal Scarn’s sheer physical might. To give Mr. Boss his credit his arsenal was better but he likely couldn't revive himself with the Red Jewel and Jason isn't super helpful. Both to have firearms and relative speed ends (other than Charlie’s dubious faster than light feat) but with greater combat experience, skill, defense, and immense strength our winner is… Micheal Scott.
Advantages and Disadvantages
Mr. Boss
“Now get out there and make someone smile.”
Advantages:
More powerful than base Micheal
Much faster if given Charlie’s feat…
Could resurrect Jasonwith the magical jewel
Greater range with rocket boots
Wider versatility of weaponry and abilities
Equal:
Best Boss
Relative Speed Ends
Disadvantages:
Much weaker than Micheal Scarn
… which is incredibly dubious to say the least
Lesser experience and combat knowledge
Possibly would kill himself with cyanide if under enough pressure
Michael Scott
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. - Wayne Gretzky” - Michael Scott”
Advantages:
Much stronger with Micheal Scarn
Greater combat experience
Could burn Mr Boss with the foreman grill
Could dodge all of Mr Boss’ firearms with ease
BFR into space???
Better defense with paintball armor
Equal:
Best Boss
Relative Speed Ends
Disadvantages:
Far weaker in base Micheal
Possibly slower with leniency on Charlie’s heat
Lesser Arsenal
The Singular Vote
Team Mr. Boss [0]: (The boys would have voted for him)
Team Michael Scott [1]: (Hippo [He voted for everyone])
Thank You
CONGRATS YOU WENT ACROSS THE RICKETY BRIDGE!
Thank you to Hippo for pretty much doing all of the blog and also thank you to Aqua and Boomer for doing some of the images. Obviously this blog is not meant to be taken as a serious source of scaling. While the calcs should be fine and most of the blog is legit Michael Scarn shouldn't be used obviously but fuck it, it's funny. The blog might and is a little old but we tried, and that's all that matters.
See you all with Agent Smith VS Cyn, a blog that isn't as good as the peak here.
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